A very loving friend we lost in Fayetteville and Hawaii

Evelyn Gardner was a true follower of Christ in our opinion. We were fortunate to know her for 36 years at Snyder Memorial Baptist here in Fayetteville. Then our lives wonderfully intersected in Hawaii: She and Joe her late husband and their son Joseph Jr lived in Honolulu during the 50's and early 60's, attending Wahiwa Baptist Church. We did not overlap there since we lived there from 1967 to 1974 and then visited and worked part time in Hawaii from 1971 to the present.
On many of our visits from about 1997 on, we would visit Evelyn's privious church and give our regards to many of her friends there. We sometimes brought back pictures, even pics of old pics going back over 50 years of the history of Wahiawa Baptist; Evelyn was delighted to receive them. One showed her teaching Sunday School there to young girls.

Then an amazing God-incident occurred in 2009 while I was working for Tripler Army Hospital; we were staying at a Quaker B&B and the resident managers asked us to join them for a dancing lesson.
When we arrived the lesson has been canceled but I heard men's voices in the next room; of course I was curious so I walked in on a Barber Shop chorus of about 60 men. At the break they introduced visitors and a man approached me when he learned I was Fayetteville, NC; this man was Dan Tom who grew up with young Joseph at the Wahiawa baptist Church. His mother and father and aunts wet good friends of Evelyn's family. This started a wonderful friendship with Dan and his extended family.
I attended church at Universtiy Ave Baptist where Dan is a member.
Then in May and June, 2012,  I was working again for a pediatrician in Honolulu. We knew that Evelyn had been hospitalized and was having a series of illness and had visited her several times over the past several months at her Clarendon apartment. On about the middle of May,  I was invited to Dan's extended family lunch and met Hiroko and Edith Dan's aunts who wanted me to take historical books and pamphlets about Wahiawa Church back to Evelyn when I was to return in early June.
Unfortunately, Evelyn went to the Lord on May 31, 2012. I gathered the material given to me earlier from her old church and Fed Exed to Snyder to Wayne Ham with an email to give it to Joe her son for the memory table of her life. I understand that a wonderful life was celebrated. We returned home about June 6, 2012. Her life touched us greatly and we miss her and look forward to seeing her in Heaven.

Hiking in Hawaii is Naka-oi!!! The Best!!! Here we are just coming down Mariner Crest.
Other hikes: Kaena Point 1968-69 w Lab Tech, Larry?
Maui w Shirley Sept 1967
Big island w Shirley Nov 1967
Molokai w Shirley June 1969
Manoa Falls with Victoria, Hanna while on way to VN Jan 98
Diamond Head before sunrise w Chris and Charlie Allred Dec 1999 Aloha Bowl
Moanaloa Trail w Brain O'hara 2009
Kualoha Beach and Pond w Brain, Amy Brinson and kids JanMarch 2010
Hiking Big Island w Chris Hunting Jan 1, 2010
Aiea Loop w Sissy Alamoana and her cousins, Brian March 2011
Koko Head Crater w Brian March 2011
Waimanalo Beach w Shirley, Brian Feb March 2011
Mariner Ridge w David Lee, Joy&Steve, May 2012
Wiamea Falls w Shirley, Joey and Gretchen Overby Feb 2012
Manoa Falls w David Wood from Friends House June 2, 2102
Haunama Bay Crest w Full Moon, David Lee June 3, 2012
Lynn Arboretum w Virginia and David Wood June 5, 2012
Steps to Heritage House June 6, 2012, repeat May 2013 see Margo Viterreli
Kauai Cabin and Lau Outlook w Shirley April 2013
MakapuuLIghtHouse May 25, 2013

A Book Review by Al Hartness, MD

The Peculiar People is the 4th of the historical novels about the Quakers written by Jan de Hartog. The first was Peaceable Kingdom, followed by The lamb's War, then The Trail of the Serpant, now this book. Other than The Lamb's War which takes place in Hitler's Germany, the other 3 follow nearly chronologically from George Fox's 16th century England to the 19th Mid-west America. de Hartog has an amazing touch of creating live people with earthy desires juxtaposed against the Friends meetings of silent inhibitory social posturing. His books are alive with adventure, love, and catastrophes; history moves along in veritable transparency and in keeping with the times with the characters. It is difficult to not finish one of these books in less than a few days or even one sitting.
I was fortunate to find and read all of these books in the Friends House in Honolulu over the years while I ran the Honolulu Marathon and later medical mission journeys to and from Vietnam. Later I found other books by de Hartog which I consider real jewels: Star of Peace, The Distant Shore, The Captain. I was never able to find the English translation for The Hospital, a true to life story of the author's work in a hospital. I am still looking.

Sounds of Aloha Barbershop

These men are another reason I enjoy Hawaii. I have been singing with them time to time since 2008. These pics are from terrific show about "Derailed Time Machine" re the long delayed rapid transit system in Honolulu. The beautiful old Hawaii Theatre was the venue on May 12, 2012.

I am amazed how we talk and sing about how the Lord is bringing us joy out of sadness and loneliness, and yet we just don't get it; we leave each other stranded like on little islands; we can send our poems, our songs, our thoughts, but no one actually reads them and therefore cares, maybe they say they do, but the walk does'nt match the talk or actions. I apologize: my sister, daughter in law, and my sons read them. But to be frank the church is turning into a talktalktalk clickclickclick even while saying all this can save you save you save you--from what?? More isolation and loneliness--it's not working. Avoidance is the easy way-(2 years ago)

but that is what Satan wants-he wants out hot coals to become cold; I can tell you that being in a Bible study and learning how the Old Test prophesies the New is amazing. Think of it this way: a lot o work, praying and listening went into how Our Bible was brought about--the spiritual revaluation form God--
April 6, 2014--

This is 4th of my blogs; the others have Hawaii, Haiti, Samoa, and Family gatherings

!st blog was arrestedevelopment.blogspot.com but I cannot find it now
2nd blog is A Pediatricians life. bloodspot.com and still active
3rd blog is DocAloha(AlofHawaii) """"" """"" """""""""""
4th blog is Al&Shirley's Hawaii"""""""""""""""""""""""""

Why we keep coming back to Hawaii--you ask?

Well, take it from Mark Twain: 'the loveliest fleet of islands in the world'!! So we started here in 1967 and it's in our bones/marrow. So you ask why not just live here in the islands all the time? Well, then we must have geographic schizophrenia: attached as we are to the South, born and bred by the grace of God in Dixie!!! And then if we lived in Hawaii where else would we go to be rejuvenated in the winter, receiving the aloha spirit, mixing with the rainbow people, visiting our friends, swimming in the healing waters of Kane, going to Shirley's favorite restaurants and eating of the wonderful fruit here!!! Yes we love the South too; the history and culture of both places makes for a pervading mix of feelings, deep rooted and unavoidably living in our hearts and souls. We have our family and friends, our church, Snyder Memorial Baptist, and obligations back in NC from which we cannot be away for too long. We are blessed, but have the (un)fortunate migratory genetic disposition, similar I suppose to whales, salmon, turtles, and various birds!!!

So this is an overview introduction of our tour de force, our gift, we are preparing you for as we take you on this wonderful journey to Hawai'i, islands of beauty, flowers, rainbows and friendship. This is our personal story; it is not like the advertisements, the glitzy vacation come-ons, the one or two week blitz in a travel mag. This is our true Aloha spirit of Hawaii that we have known and know in working, enjoying, and staying here many times, as long as 3 years, as short as 2 weeks, and everything in between. Mahalo for enjoying this blog!!! By this way, we hope that we can impart the aloha spirit to you. Please feel free to make comments!!!

Songs

There is wonderful music in Hawai'i, much of it very popular as you know, a special quality that is haunting and melodic, an ingratiating beat. The best song though that describes the islands or for that matter any place that holds beauty is the one that our grandson, Matthew, learned to play as his first piano piece: Beethoven's Ode to Joy!!! Read the words about dancing sunlight, flowers, living things, that behold the wonder of God's Creation. Here in Hawaii that happens all year long with some variations in the climate; whereas in the winter months up North waiting and patience are the character building traits. So in a way the life style here can be insidious and slowing, maybe seductive but still aware of grace to save one's soul. Aloha, as a poem by Meredith instructs, can mean so many things: love, greeting, but also waiting, paradoxically, in a state of grace. There are no snakes here, he says, but sin can be more surreptitious and may exist in a state of mimicry, not recognizable. Tropic romance being the rational of a hosts of authors who visited these luring visions, bring visitors still attempting to find their paradise here!

So is Hawaii an illusion that after some time it becomes another reality: with the humdrum of every day living, working or paying for it's price tag, handling the traffic, sometimes the heat when the trades stop blowing, or the 'vog' comes in from the volcano on the Big Island with the Kona weather?

Well, when you go without Hawaii for one, better two or three years, you miss it; we don't tire of it. We leave it at our age without strings, without burdens and can therefore not feel tied down, although every time I come here I feel tempted to buy some part of the rock; we did own here nearly 40 years ago and for several years regretted selling, but have reconciled that with our homes back in NC. Then however, as we get older toward our mid-70's I wonder if retiring here in some development for seniors may be attractive. Food for thought.

Food

Speaking of food, we come back to the same restaurants as much as possible: Buzz's Steak House in Lanakai, Waioli Tea Room in Manoa Valley, Hula Grill at Outrigger above Duke's, evenings under the banyan tree with pupus at the Moana Hotel, Liliha Bakery for breakfast or lunch, KaiAina delicious hamburgers in Hale'iwa, Top of the I at the Ilikai for pupu's at the bar, ask for Fred.

Some new places we found are Any Time at King and Kapahula, Asia Manoa, Zippy's many locations, Big City Diner, Frog House on Kalakaua for excellent Korean dishes--important to go with a Korean friend.

For farmer's markets there is the Manoa on Tues and Thurs; be sure to visit the Sat market at Kapiolani Community College and go early for mouth watering grazing of so many different cultural experiences as well as fruits and vegetables, plants for the home table and garden.

Tragedies

Well , I left Honolulu 1 day b4 the tsunami hit, the terrible tragedy in Japan. It seems that about nearly ever time I am coming or going re Hawaii some tragedy happens: Haiti, Samoa, Indonesia, New Zealand, a murder of close ones; now this, the another nighmare. It gives no time to savour our memories; they are replaced by the suffering, the news of death and injury. We are besieged by news of something bigger than what we want to dream about, to hang on to the beauty, the smells, our love, our friends, our occurrences, our journal; all take 2nd place or worse. But this is life, these are the times like in the crying out by David in the Psalms, that we need to be in accordance with the suffering and somehow help out, to reach out either directly or indirectly. We can sit and gaze out from the Moana Hotel at sunset about what we did beyond the western horizon and relish those times, but we must continue to be vigilant of how we can be of service.

Friends

Speaking of friends I must mention them but no names; they will know who they are: a teacher who we have known for 44 years, dedicated to her students, goes the extra mile, holds forensic debates and her students have won many honors; she is forthright and sometimes knifelike honest, telling it like it is; she holds rightfully positions on several boards in the islands; we admire her greatly. We enjoy her company sitting in anticipation of island knowledge and lore.

A pediatrician colleague of mine when we worked together 37-39 years ago but years make no difference as we have continued to stay connected even these last times; he's easy going, we make no demands of each other but we all, including our wives, can enjoy the fellowship and camaraderie over a drink or dinner or hiking or swimming; there's a easy going air and relaxation ambience as well as the value of years mellowing and yet aging in the good way of fine wines.

A husband and wife from another island that I have had the privilege of being on medical missions for over 10 years to Vietnam and Cambodia; they are quiet, non prejudicious, accepting and have hearts of gold toward their fellow man especially those in need. They give of themselves in an almost surreptitious way that demands no attention. I look to them for spiritual inspiration and guidance. It is a joy to be with them on missions or here in the islands.

A friend that I met most in a serendipity way about 4 years ago at a singing in Honolulu, and who happened to be good friends of a family back here in my hometown. He also happened to go to the same church, University Ave Baptist, I attend in the islands. He has become also a valuable friend and witness to our faith. To have friends like these makes Hawaii more than just a paradise; it gives essence to a good feeling and understanding of a special link that can survive 5000 miles and several years of physical absence, but holding on to that spiritual contact.

Then there are the resident mangers of kind of B&B, back to 1993 where we often stay on way to a Vietnam medical mission, or just hanging out on vacation, that have been so meaningful every morning for breakfast, sometimes meeting others who have temporary lodging like ourselves, everyone with a story, funny or sad, to tell, something to add to the fabric of the place. One is about a Japanese young woman teacher at the time who was ordered off the train by soldiers on the way to Hiroshima that tragic day, now a very special lady who quilts and speaks of peace.

I can name so many others: the doctor who has a heart for the Samoan people, that I accompanied on a mission. Another pediatrician whose passion has been the adventures of the outdoors of Hawai'i, hiking, kayaking; the Trukese (Chukese) people migrated to the islands especially Emau the doctor turned pastor, the Cambodion pastor who barely survived the killing fields, the pastor and his wife where I attend church. Of course our physician friends who introduced my wife and me, who first led us here in 1967 by applying for the pediatric residency program, spending 2 years together here, and have continued to interweave their lives with ours over the years.